You’re Lucky You’re Cute (Response to a writing prompt found on Pinterest)

“That’s disgusting.  You’re lucky you’re cute,” Hermione told Crookshanks, who ignored her and kept chewing on a leftover chicken leg bone.

“That cat has never been cute a day in his life,” Ron said casually, never looking up from his paperwork.

“Pay no attention to him, sweetheart,” Hermione crooned to the cat.  “He’s just jealous.”

Crookshanks looked up at Hermione, glared at Ron, and proceeded to roll over and start licking the base of his tail instead.

Ron grimaced.  “Now that’s disgusting.”

Hermione laughed as Crookshanks stuck his tongue out at Ron with a comical expression, then went right back to grooming himself.

“He’s just mad because he can’t do that,” Hermione assured the part-kneazle, who grunted in apparent agreement before returning to his previous activity.

Ron sputtered indignantly as Hermione collapsed in a fit of laughter.

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Xena and Gabrielle in Rivendell (Original idea set in the Xenaverse)

Xena, Gabrielle, and Bilbo approached the small party of elves waiting for them at the entrance to Rivendell.

Mae govannen,” Elrond greeted them warmly.  “We’ve been expecting you, Bilbo.  Gandalf sent a message ahead of you, explaining you were on your way, and that you were bringing two new friends with you as escorts.”

“Yes, this is Xena and Gabrielle, two travelers who happened upon my home as I was preparing for my birthday party,” Bilbo replied, indicating each young woman in turn.  “They kindly offered to accompany me at least as far as your home, as they’d never been near the valley in their travels before.”

“Enter, friends, and take rest,” Elrond invited, waving them in before him.  “When you are rested, come find me, and we will talk.  We can exchange stories of our travels over a late supper, and learn much from each other.”

“Thank you,” Xena answered.  “We would be glad of a short rest.  We’ve been traveling since first light.”

Elrond himself led the travelers to their rooms, and after ensuring they had everything they needed, left them alone.

“I’m not sure which I want first, a long nap or a longer bath,” Gabrielle said wearily, leaning her staff against the wall.  “My whole body aches in places I didn’t even know I had.”

Xena walked through to the next room, which turned out to hold a sunken tub, with bath oils already set out along one side.  It was already filled with steaming water, and Xena was tempted to slide right in, clothes and all, but decided it wouldn’t be prudent to take her chakram and sword with her.

Stepping back into the bedroom, she leaned her sword next to Gabrielle’s staff and placed her chakram on the table.  “The tub is already filled, and there are bath oils on the ledge,” she informed her friend.  “You go first, while I find us some fresh clothes.”

“Deal,” Gabrielle said, dropping her pack on the floor.  “I can’t wait to get a few hours’ sleep in a real bed for a change.”

“Hear, hear!” Xena agreed, stretching to work the soreness out of her back.  “A girl can only take so many nights of sleeping on the ground before turning into a hunchback.  I don’t care how long we spend here, I intend to take full advantage of the facilities while we’re able.”

“I couldn’t agree more,” Gabrielle called from the tub.

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With Friends Like These… (Response to a writing prompt found on Pinterest)

“What happened to me last night?”

“You thought you developed magical powers and could talk to squirrels.”

“Kind of glad I don’t remember any of that.”

“It’s okay, I got it all on video.”

“Oh joy, you can show it to my grandkids in thirty years and embarrass the hell out of me.”

“I have no intention of waiting that long to embarrass you.  I put it on YouTube first thing this morning.”

“You did what?!?

“Yep.  Right now there are about 5,000 hits…oh, my bad, that was a couple hours ago…now there are 10,000 hits.”

“I’m so going to kill you!”

“Well, you always wanted to be famous, now you are.  You’re welcome.”

“You are so dead!  You just wait.  You have to sleep sometime.”

There was a sudden burst of laughter from the living room, followed by a gleeful shout.  “Hey guys, come check this out!  Somebody put last night’s party on YouTube!”

“Dead.  Man.  Walking.”

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Verizon Didn’t Exist Yet (Response to a writing prompt found on Pinterest)

“Look, I’m sorry I missed your inauguration, but I was stuck in 1754.”  The Doctor was starting to sound exasperated.

“You still should have called.”

“I didn’t have cell service!”


“Verizon didn’t exist yet!  The telephone didn’t exist yet!  It wouldn’t even be invented for another hundred and twenty-two years!  What was I supposed to do, send you a message by carrier pigeon?  The electric telegraph wouldn’t even be invented for almost a hundred years from when I was!”

“So you’re going to tell me that you couldn’t have used the TARDIS to send out a message?  Come on, Doctor, I know better than that!  I’m from Gallifrey too, remember, I know how those machines work just as well as you do!” The Master scoffed at his oldest friend.

“I could have done, if I hadn’t crash landed in 1754—which was your fault, by the way—and had to spend all my time repairing the old girl!  I came straight back as soon as she was fixed, but of course she decided to be stubborn and bring me back six months after the date I entered into the console, otherwise I’d have been back several days beforehand.  So it’s all your own fault, really.”

“Is that right?”

“That’s right.  You should keep that in mind, the next time you want me to be somewhere on time, to not tamper with my only means of transportation so that I can get there on time!

“Okay, okay!  Note to self: Don’t sabotage the Doctor’s precious TARDIS anymore, at least not when I want him to be on time for an important event.  There, happy?”

“Ecstatic.  Now pass me that bottle of aspirin, I’m getting a headache…”

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UFOs in the Wizarding World (Response to a writing prompt found on Pinterest)

“How the hell am I going to explain this?”



“Yeah, you know, the face-hugger buggers from those sci-fi movies,” Harry added helpfully.

“And just how the hell am I supposed to explain to purebloods what face-huggers are, let alone any other kind of alien?” Draco looked around at the destruction, undecided whether he was more exasperated with his partner or disgusted by all the blood and guts everywhere.  At the moment, he was leaning toward exasperation.

You know what they are, and you’re a pureblood,” Harry pointed out.

“I also hang around with you, Hermione and the weasel most of the time.  Not too many purebloods even know what a television is, let alone movies, and I couldn’t even begin to explain sci-fi to them.”

“So tell them it was a previously unknown species of magical creature that Luna and her dad had recently discovered.  Since they’re always coming back from their travels with stories of new creatures it will be an easy sell.  Either they’ll believe you or they won’t, but if questioned, Luna and Xeno will play along.”

“Why do I bother listening to you?  It always gets me into trouble,” Draco muttered, then sent off a Patronus to their boss at the Ministry.

“Yes, but there’s never a dull moment,” Harry offered, grinning.

“There’s always a mountain of paperwork, too.”

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They were looking, but I didn’t care (Response to a writing prompt found on Pinterest)

They were looking, but I didn’t care.

I ran to him anyway.  “Potter!” I cried, then ran across the expanse between Death Eaters and Hogwarts defenders to Harry’s side.

“Are you with us, Draco?” he asked me, searching my face for the truth.  “Are you really with us?  Because if not, that little stunt could have cost you your life for nothing.”

“I’m with you till the end, Harry…always,” I answered.  I didn’t know why, but I sensed he really needed to hear that last word.  I dropped my Occlumency shields and let him see everything.  After staring into my eyes for what seemed like ages, he finally nodded.

“Then stand beside us, Draco…take your place and fight your former master,” he stated.

“He was never truly my master, Harry, I hope you know that.  I took the Mark because I had to, to save my family, but I was never truly with him, no matter what I said.”

“I know, Draco.  Now show everyone else, take your place beside us and prepare to fight.”

I willingly stood beside him, the savior of the wizarding world, the Chosen One, my one true friend—Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived—and hoped his luck continued to hold out for just a little bit longer.  I raised my wand, aimed it at Voldemort and his Death Eaters—yes, even at my father—and prepared to fight.

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Stupid Question (Response to a writing prompt found on Pinterest)

“There’s no such thing as a stupid question,” Hermione declared.

“What’s in mango salsa?” Harry asked innocently.

“I stand corrected.”

Ron snorted.  “Finally, someone stumped Hermione.”

“Nobody asked you, Ronald!”

“I never thought I’d see the day…”

“You’re not helping, Ronald!”

“Sure I am!  I’m helping Harry.”

“Helping him do what, sound like a bigger idiot than you usually do?”

“I do not sound like an idiot!”

“Only when you open your mouth…”

“Alright, children, settle down!  If you can’t play nice, I’ll have to send you to your rooms,” Harry interjected, trying not to laugh.

“Seeing as how we share a room, that wouldn’t be so bad,” Ron commented, leering at Hermione, who just rolled her eyes.

“See what I have to live with, Harry?  How did you stand it for six years?”

“Well, there were three other boys in the room as well, so that helped.  I didn’t have to put up with him all by myself.”

“Well, that solution’s right out,” Hermione decided.  “Any other suggestions?”

“Ear plugs?”


“Silencing Charm?”

“I’m right here!”

“Lock him out of your room when he gets too annoying?  He still seems to have trouble getting past Colloportus.”

Hermione doubled over with laughter as Ron sputtered indignantly beside them.

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